What happened to us this week was not just the pre-Christmas madness and the rivalry between brothers and sisters.

Kramer, our Christmas kitten arrived three weeks in advance.

At 4 pm on Tuesday afternoon, Sally: "Hi, Danielle. Can you collect Kramer this afternoon?"

At 5:30 in the afternoon, we took a handful of Kramer home, a bag of tofu cat litter and a few bags of pink kitten food.

Stella, a 10-year-old white poodle, may have difficulty learning and looks completely confused.

For five days, when the old cat Lulu and Kramer passed by, they only made a sister-like hiss.

That night, everything was quiet.

Cricket is played on TV with subtitles and no sound (our favorite new thing).

I read a book on my lap with Lulu.

Husband, concentrating on crickets or snoozing (it's hard to tell), Stella is by his side, and baby Kramer is asleep in her kitten manger.

Christmas Eve. Everything is calm.

A loud snoring sound made the whole scene clear.

Stella leaped vertically into Kramer's cage like an Apache attack helicopter; she was once a trembling wreck of calm paint.

Before you could say "Jewish lesbian Hanukkah Kitten Kramer", Lulu burst out of my chest, just like Sigourney Weaver’s alien, jumping in from my right shoulder The kitchen, over the bench, sneak under the kitchen table.

Kramer fell asleep the whole time.

The beauty of kittens.

...Many people will argue that tofu and cat litter have a lot in common...

In the ten years since Lulu was a kitten, tofu cat litter has become a thing; obviously, for vegan cats who like to eat while defecate.

All thanks to the people who decided to reuse the tasteless tofu for cat litter.

The truth is, I am a fan of tofu, but many people will argue that tofu and cat litter have a lot in common. White, tasteless and easy to digest.

I want to know how tofu turns into cat litter?

Is it the tofu that the Buddha refused?

Is it really tofu-or is tofu so similar to cat litter-which comes first-tofu or cat litter?

Now, a week later, Stella fell asleep in the Sunday morning sun at the bottom of our stairs, Kramer was beside him, and Lulu wrapped them both.

By the end of the year, you will be the usually exhausted liar.

So, this is my last column until February:

"It was the week before Christmas, and all the creatures in the house were snoring, including rats.

The parents are very quiet, sitting together watching the cricket, while Lulu dreams of chicken wings and the neighbor’s gray whip.

I was in my pajamas with Lulu on my lap, just napping, ready to take a nap before Christmas.

Something should appear when you get up from the sofa, but Stella's Poodle...absolutely...no...idea.

Lulu jumped into the kitchen; she caused such an uproar. I dropped the book and screamed "merde!" What's the matter?

Cricket's subtitles glowed softly in the living room, and now the conscious husband was smiling..."I know".

Faster than the eagle, his hounds came, and he called their names one by one:

"Now it's Stella, Lulu, and Cat Kramer. Now it's Marvin and Noodles in Pet Paradise."

He jumped up from the sofa and his team whistled.

They all flew up, like the feathers of a thistle.

Next, when we returned to the night, I heard him exclaiming:

I wish you all a Merry Christmas, and good night everyone!

PS 21 years of magical Christmas moments... Janet’s shortbread and blackberry jam and Lorraine’s wonderful company. Blessed!

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